Seriously?

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

I have read so many articles and lists recently regarding “What not to say to an Autism Parent” and “The 10 dumbest things people have said”, etc…….

And yes, yes, I’ve heard almost all of them before – more than once.

I’ve been told “He doesn’t look Autistic”

He doesn’t look Autistic

At a birthday party a parent asked “Does he eat?”

Another: “Can he talk?”

Yes

“Well he’s okay then, right?”

I’ve always said that I’d rather people ask questions than stare or assume. Some people do, and I always welcome the fact that they want to learn. I have had many wonderful conversations with strangers that were genuinely interested in learning about autism – his autism, as the saying goes…. “If you meet one Autistic person, you’ve met ONE Autistic person.” ~ Unknown

Recently I was visiting DC’s work program. There was a woman standing there that looked a bit familiar to me, but I could not place her. She looked at me and said “I know you, Vickie”

I was the team manager for our local Special Olympics golf team for a few years (insert laughter, as I know NOTHING about golf) and her nephew who has autism, was one of my players.

We chatted for a bit. As it turned out, she was there because her nephew was transitioning into the same work program as DC.

As we were chatting, she said:

“Your son is SO handsome. You should be thankful he has Autism so you won’t have to worry about all of the girls that would be flocking around him”

Now she is a very nice woman and I know in her own way, she actually thought this was a compliment, but……..

Seriously?????

Literally Speaking

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

Raining Cats and Dogs

Twelve years ago, I wrote this:

“You can NEVER be too specific:

While learning “grocery shopping” in the classroom; his plastic cart full of plastic food… he was told that it was time to “put everything on the counter to pay” – Instead of taking the food out of the cart, he lifted the entire cart onto the counter!”

And

“When you tell your child to pull his sweat pants down over his socks and he proceeds to PULL HIS PANTS DOWN from the waist to his ankles – You know you were not specific enough with your request.”

And a few years later, this:

My son loves to write little “stories” (he thinks they are stories, but they are usually just one line).

I had been home from work for a few days with the “Flu”. It really didn’t occur to me that he had no idea what the “Flu” was and I wondered why he would laugh each time I mentioned it. He decided he would write one of his one-line “stories” for me to make me feel better ……

“Mom was so high”

It took me a few minutes…… but then I realized he thought I “Flew”

Then there was the time I said “Now listen closely” and he stuck his face one inch from mine…..
He laughed for about a week after I told him it was time to “hit the road”.
Or.. after the third round of kids whacked the piñata at his camp Halloween party, the Director said “Okay, DC, lets’ see you to tear it up” – he yanked it down and ripped it apart with his hands.

Tear it up

There are so many other examples, but these few really stick in my head.

Needless to say, like many people with autism, DC takes everything literally. Over the years, I have gotten much better at recognizing when something is said or read that taken literally will not make much sense to him. I always try to stop and explain what it means in that context, whether he asks or not.

He has made a great deal of progress in that area as well. He knows that the “flu” does not mean “flying”. He gets that “hit the road” means we have to get going. But he knows these things because they were explained to him, he is not able just figure it out himself – how could he?

Knowing this about my son, I suppose, when I told him to “walk slowly” on the sidewalk just in case there was ice (there wasn’t), I should have expected this:

Progress with a Side of Pasta

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

Progress with a side of Pasta

Looking back over the past year, I can honestly say that it has been a very good and productive year.

DC completed his first full year of “work”. He transitioned into it very well. Me? I am the one still having a problem calling it “work” and not “school”, the “car” is here, instead of the “bus”. I panic each time a school vacation comes along because I have to make plans for DC while I’m working, until I realize he doesn’t get those weeks off anymore; he’s working. The transition seems to be much more difficult for me than it was for him.

Volunteer “Dream Job”

My “Broadway Baby” also has a volunteer job as a Greeter at a local theater, with a job coach of course. He loves it and does well. The shifts are long, but he makes it through and he is happy when he gets home. How many of us can say we have our Dream Job? DC has his.

Because of his “theater experience” he was asked to help his camp by passing out programs at the annual “Thank You to Our Civic Groups” picnic. Unfortunately, the promise of cheeseburgers after he was finished totally distracted him while he was supposed to be working, so we will write that one off as a “trial run” and I will know how to better explain the process to him next year.

Communication-wise, I’ve noticed that I am doing much less prompting to get him to respond to a greeting and many times he will initiate a greeting himself; although “Hello Old Lady” isn’t exactly in my top ten, he DID initiate the conversation himself. He was also able to tell me a couple of times, in his own way, but in a way that I was able to figure out, that he wasn’t feeling well.

He has been asking to do more things “All by myself”, like making his lunch for ~~school~~ work, his breakfast, making his bed and shaving. “All by myself” means he doesn’t even want me in the room (a good thing with the shaving……. I make him nervous – me?- “Mom, are you still here?”).

This year we skipped our annual Halloween trip to either Salem or Sleepy Hollow and decided to go to New York ComicCon. To say it was crowded is an understatement. He did well. Yes, he was anxious, but he controlled himself as best he could. Mike TeeVee came at the perfect moment. DC was getting anxious so we were on our way off the show floor because I could see he was getting upset. We happened upon “Mr. TeeVee” on the way. No line, as I don’t think anyone realized he was there yet. He was very nice and was able to spend some extra time with DC. DC calmed down right away.

He waited in line for an HOUR and A HALF to see the love of his life, Felicia Day. Do you remember when your kids were little? When they would finally eat or do something that they never would before and you were afraid to even look at them for fear they would stop? This is exactly how I felt standing in that line with him. I don’t think I was even breathing. Fortunately she came out early and we were relatively close to the front of the line, so I knew we were “home free” at that point. He was excited when she came out but then he turned to me and said “I am very nervous about this”. He has used the word “nervous” up to this point only when there was a storm, never about meeting anyone. I think he realized right then and there that the people he sees on TV or in the movies are real people AND that this person, that he adores, is someone special.

Penny’s Frozen Yogurt

We made it to the front, I could breathe again. She was lovely to him. It made his day.

He was also able to meet William Shatner. He does know who that is due to his mother (me). He was very nice to him as well but “no pictures please”. We did forget to tell him that DC was born on his birthday; maybe that would have rated us a picture –but live and learn.

His Uncle asked him to sing Edelweiss at the table on Christmas Eve. DC is, and always has been, a ham so I was surprised that he sang the song, looking only at me and then buried his head in my arm when he was finished. Bashful! Embarrassed! I don’t know if this is a good thing or not, BUT, it IS a new reaction and a new emotion so I will add this to the Plus Column as well.

There is so much more I can say about this year, but my point is, DC is 22, he continues to make progress. No, not in leaps and bounds as he did when he was younger, but it is there.

No matter what the age, there is always progress to be made. It may not even be noticeable right away, but it is there.

And, Oh……. On New Year’s Eve, Eve, two days before the year ended, he actually ate pasta. PASTA!

Happy New Year!

How do you solve a problem like……

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

My Favorite Things

One of DC’s favorite musicals – and there are plenty- is the Sound Of Music.

He was introduced to the Sound Of Music by his cousin Erica, who gave him his first copy of the movie in VHS form when he was 6 or 7. I never imagined he would watch it, let alone learn every word to every song, but he did. It is still one of his favorites.

He has the DVDs, the soundtrack, the album insert, books (which were not easy to find), Christmas ornaments, music box, he dressed as “Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes”

Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes.

for the “Sound Of Music Sing-A-Long” a few years back….. you get the picture…… he loves it.

Girls in white dresses…… Snowflakes…. Silver White Winters/Melt into Spring…… Favorite Things…..

***I am fortunate to have friends that are willing to go all out for something that DC loves so much; we all took a line from that song and dressed appropriately for the Sing-A-Long. He and his friends had a ball and I think after the initial embarrassment, my friends did as well.***

A few weeks ago I found myself being tortured with “The Sound of Music Live”**. My fault! I told him it was on! I then regretted that for the next 2 hours. DC informed me over and over again that this was “Not Julie Andrews”, but he loved it anyway.

While I was trying to endure this version, my mind went back to DC’s time in the school system and more specifically, the mainstream portion of his time there……

–….this is the way my mind works……

I am all for inclusion and mainstreaming, IF it is done properly. In Dc’s case, there were many battles over many years because it was not.

Just a few examples: His history class was studying Apartheid and DC was coloring pictures of Africa.

His history class was studying Nazi Germany and he was sent off to watch “The Sound of Music” (because that’s a true and complete picture of Nazi Germany) .

Inclusion? – I don’t think so! I understand that these concepts were somewhat out of his reach, but if nothing else, shouldn’t this inclusion include social interaction with peers and some sort of participation in and with the class? How did they call this “Inclusion” when he was coloring in the back of the room or in another room watching an entirely different movie?

As we were watching “The Sound of Music Live” and singing “Edelweiss” together – as is mandatory, I remembered one teacher, years ago; his second grade teacher, Mrs. Fair* . She went out of her way to not only include DC in the class BUT, believe it or not, to also include the entire class in activities that DC enjoyed. She made him a part of this class. He was not an observer or off on the side lines, he was a part of the class.

I can give you many examples of the things she did to achieve this, but the one that came to mind that night was; She was aware of DC’s love for the “Sound Of Music” and his love for “Edelweiss”. She had the entire class learn all of the words to the song and once or twice a week, she and DC would lead the class in song. He loved it! She made sure he was part of this class, she made sure his “inclusion” was not just one- sided, she made sure he was comfortable with his classmates and better yet, they were comfortable with him. He just adored her.

It is unfortunate that she was the exception and not the norm. He still remembers her all these years later and the Sound of Music is still one of his “Favorite Things”

*Name changed

**Yes, he is getting the DVD and soundtrack for Christmas, but he can watch/listen to it in his room

Avonte Oquendo’s hopeful family continues search – New York News

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

Avonte Oquendo's hopeful family continues search – New York News.

Still Missing! Please share!

Anxious?…. Who?…… Me????

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

One could (and would) say I am a little bit anxious, just a tad…… especially when it comes to children. I drive myself crazy watching other people’s children. I’ve pulled drowning kids out of pools and lakes while their parents were not watching them, grabbed kids away from traffic, ledges or anything that may cause an injury, again while their own parents were not watching. When we go to a fair or some other type of event where there are a lot of people, there is a good chance I will be bringing a lost child to security or helping him/her find his/her parents. There’s more; but you get the picture. I can’t help this. I have always been like this. I have always said that I am just too paranoid to be anyone’s mother.

So why not give me a child with Autism…..

Welcome to a whole new level of anxiety…..

I was talking to my friend, Al at work last week. His son had just been sick; trip to the Emergency Room sick. He’s just fine now, but I can imagine how frightening it must have been at the time. This particular day was the day of his follow-up appointment. From there we moved on to the subject about his own anxiety. He insists on taking his kids to the doctor for everything (in his words). I get that! It’s always worth a trip to the doctor just to hear everything is all right than to continue to worry that a cold may not be just a cold…..just for the peace of mind. But he was beginning to feel that he was being overly protective.

Now believe me, he has heard plenty of my DC-obsessed stories before but I decided he needed to hear a few more.

I told him that when DC was little I would calculate the time that he would be alone until my ex got home from work if I dropped dead, “right now”. I’d make sure there was nothing around that could hurt him if something like that were to happen. I had no reason to believe I’d be “dropping dead” at any time, but just in case, I had to be ready. I forgot to tell him that I would also force myself to watch Rescue 911 (hosted by William Shatner) when DC was little and then have nightmares about all the horrible things that they showed. His father always asked why I insisted on watching a show that gave me nightmares. I told him that I was afraid that they would show some sort of dangerous situation that I hadn’t considered yet and I might miss something very important to DC’s safety – There were actually a few accidents that I wouldn’t have come up with in my own head, believe it or not, unless I had seen the show. So there!

I also forgot to tell him about the time I called my poor sister-in-law at her cottage continuously because his father took him camping at the beach, near her cottage and didn’t call for two days! What if something happened to him and DC was in some tent on a beach of all places, by himself? – Fortunately his Dad’s sisters are used to me…..

I’ve been a single mother for 20 years now and I wouldn’t have it any other way, but being alone with a child with special needs can be, for me frightening at times. Anytime I am sick I wonder again, if I dropped dead “right now”, how long would it be before someone knows he’s alone? What would he do? Would he be safe until someone figures this out? As you can see, it’s not the me “dropping dead” that I worry about, it is DC being by himself for who knows how long.

The final nugget from the “tales from the anxiety-ridden mother” for Al was to tell him that when DC was young and we went grocery shopping; he would get in the car, I would unload the groceries and then I would walk the 20 feet to put the cart back, in full view of the car. But I would be sure to leave his door wide open because if I happened to get hit by a car in those 20 feet (or drop dead), no one would know he was sitting in the car and I couldn’t say for sure that he would get out or let anyone know he was there. He could be sitting there for hours before someone notices. At least someone might wonder why there was a car door wide open in the parking lot and take a look inside.

– In any situation, I can come up with at least a dozen disaster scenarios. I can and do make myself crazy over this child, but he’s worth every second of my the anxiousness.

Needless to say, Al went home that day feeling much better about himself.

He’s 22 and in case you were wondering.. I do still check to see if he’s breathing at night.

(We won’t talk about the 6 days with no power, no phone and no cell service during the snow-pocalypse a few years back………)

“I Love you, Mom” (Just a little Thanksgiving Quickie)

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

DC flashing the I Love you Sign as he does almost anytime he walks by me.

Who would not be thankful for this wonderful child who will just flash me the “I Love You” sign, just because he happens to be walking by or just randomly peek around the corner to say “I love you, Mom”.

Happy Thanksgiving…….

A Series of Ridiculous Events

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

To whom it may concern - Lost a Dunkin Donuts

To whom it may concern – Lost at Dunkin Donuts

(To lighten the mood a just a little bit.)

Many of my stories are about my son, DC and his autism. I suppose this is one of them, in a round-about kind of way. Ten years later, this series of mishaps still makes me shake my head and laugh.

DC does not like to have “baby-sitters”. He is good with the people he had after school and now that he is finished with school, the people he has after work. He is fine with that because they are here when he gets home and I am not; I am still at work. If I am home and then leave him with someone; that is a whole different ball game. He doesn’t tolerate it well, at all.

Add that to that the fact that he will not go to sleep until I get home. He is all right for a few hours but after a while he will begin asking/ repeating “Mom is coming home soon”. There is nothing anyone can say to make him stop asking/repeating that phrase.

(File that, bit of information for later)

Now, on to Doug…..

Doug is always the last to embrace any sort of technology. In 2003 (or 2004), he did not own a cell phone. But, in his defense, that was still a time when not everyone owned cell phones. We were still required to actually KNOW other people’s phone numbers.

Doug had my cell phone number programmed into his landline – “Speed Dial #2” – my home phone was “Speed Dial #1”.

There were many times I told that this was not the best idea. One day he would need to call me and he would not be at home to hit “Speed Dial 1, 2 or 3 (3 being my work #) and he would not be able to get in touch with me.

(File this bit of information for later as well)

That particular year a group of parents got together and decided to make an attempt to pressure the Town Park and Recreation Department to develop Adaptive Recreation Programs for disabled children. There were really no programs available at that time and we believed that it was only fair to have programs available to our kids just as they were available to all of the other children in town.

This project required quite a lot of time, parent meetings, petitions, and meetings with Boards, Commissions and the Town Council. It did not help our cause that this was a particularly hostile budget year; a proposed Zero budget increase year.

On the night of the Town Council meeting that they were to approve or not approve the proposed budget, Doug came over to stay with DC, so I could attend the meeting along with the other parents in the group.

I told him it would probably run very late since, as I said earlier, this was a very volatile budget year.

(“Very late” – another point to file for later)

I told him he could try to get DC to go to bed, but if he could not, he should just let him “relax” on the couch and with any luck, he might just doze off.

The meeting was long… very long. I checked my cell often to be sure there were no problems at home. I even went out into the lobby to call home around 9:30 and told him again that it was going to be late.

When it got to be about 11:00pm, I started to worry that if DC was still awake, and chances are, he was; he was really going to be driving Doug crazy asking for me. It was also a school night and I didn’t want him to be up that late.

One friend, knowing how obsessive I am about weight and my backside, said jokingly “If you get up now, your a## will be on live TV” as the council meetings are televised live (file that too!). So I stayed. After another 15 minutes, another friend and I decided we would risk it and got up and left together.

I got home around 11:30 to a note on the kitchen table:

It’s 11:15! Where are you? We went out to look for you.

So now I’m home, and they are out looking for me! Doug had no cell phone remember, so I could not even call to say I was home.

It was another 15 or 20 minutes before they came back. DC is now upset because not only was I not home, but Doug dragged him out at 11:15 to look for me as if I were lost.

I asked why he didn’t just call me if he was so worried or if DC was driving him that crazy.

Blank stare…… crickets……..

BECAUSE HE DIDN’T KNOW MY CELL NUMBER AND HE COULD NOT HIT “SPEED DIAL #2”!

He then told me that they were searching the Dunkin Donuts hoping to find me there. When he didn’t find me at the Dunkin Donuts’ in town, and the one in the next town over, he decided to look for me at my friend Donna’s house, because he assumed we were there “gabbing”. Luckily they stopped back at my house first before barging into Donna’s house at 11:45PM.

!!!???!!!

Why didn’t he drive to the Town Hall? They had to go right by on the way to the first Dunkin Donuts and again on the way to the second.

“Who would ever think that a meeting would go on that long?! You people must be crazy to sit at a meeting that long!” (I said VERY LATE, I did, TWICE!) – If we go back to our “filed information” we remember that the meetings are TELEVISED –LIVE and he only needed to turn on the TV to see it was still in progress.

To add insult to injury, he wrote the note on THE BACK OF DC’s HOMEWORK!

So now, I am trying to get DC to bed and desperately trying to erase the note on the back of the page and seriously considering “losing” his homework just so his teacher wouldn’t have the impression that I was out gallivanting (yes, gallivanting, I’m old) to the point that they had to go out looking for me.

So what did I take away from this series of events, you might ask?

– Wear a long coat to all televised meetings.

– I obviously don’t get out much, as 11:15 is cause to send out a search party.

– I must spend much more time at Dunkin Donuts than I ever realized.

– I should leave messages at random Dunkin Donuts in the event people may think I am missing.

– Trying to erase crazed notes written on the back of my son’s homework is futile. – Fortunately I had a parent/teacher conference the following week and his teacher got a kick out of the story. And… yes… she did see the note.

And regarding “Speed Dial #2”

– Never pass up the opportunity to say “I told you so”

*The Adaptive Program budget was approved

Dear Abby – Feeling Chastised in New England

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

Let me just begin by saying that since I began writing this blog I have had the pleasure of meeting a few Autistic Adults. They are amazing individuals that do a great deal to raise awareness about autism. I “speak” with one in particular often enough to consider him a friend. He is a wonderful human being and it makes my day to “talk” with him or just read his posts. He is truly an inspiration to parents of children with autism, other teens and adults with autism. But above all that, he is a glowing example of the good things that can be found in today’s young adults in general. I don’t think of him as having autism, I think of him as my friend, plain and simple. I’m honored to have him as my friend.

My son’s autism or level of autism is not like my new friends’. Autism affects each person differently. Therefore, parents should not be made to feel inferior or chastised for their own beliefs. Everyone is different, everyone. There is no right or wrong, when it comes to autism, just a lot of people arguing with each other, it seems.

Today I received this private message on my face book page from a friend of mine who is pretty much in the same boat as I am “level-wise”.

The fact that she did not feel comfortable posting it publicly, speaks volumes about the environment we find ourselves in with the hostility that she (and I) knew would have ensued had she posted it publicly.

(The following message is used with permission. The names have been changed to protect the innocent)

Dear Abby (Vickie)…I think I’m missing something. Why is it wrong to feel like I’ve lost something in having an Autistic son? Why are we supposed to not want a “cure” or something that helps them handle this world we live in a little better? I look at the video of Bob from birth to 18 months and there were signs, but he was still there. It was June of 1996 – he was 18 months old – all of a sudden he disappeared. He is lost to me. He will never have a normal life. He will constantly need care and supervision. There are many people that are on the much higher functioning side of the spectrum that can navigate the world today. Bob is not one of them. Why am I supposed to not want that to be different? People say you don’t miss what you never had – but I know what could have been. I know what life he could have had and now for sure will not. He will find happiness somehow; he will be as productive as his disability allows him to be. But the sky is not the limit for him. The opportunities for him are not the same as they are for my daughters. Why am I supposed to celebrate that? With all this hullaballoo about celebrating autism over the last few months, I’ve been feeling like a minority. I think these kids are lost – lost to the life that could have been, lost to the possibilities that would have been. I feel they have a disability because they are “not able” to process and handle what happens in life the way others do. Why are we getting lost on the rhetoric? Am I missing something Vickie?

Feeling Chastised in New England

I have said this many times and in many different ways:

I celebrate my son as an individual
I celebrate my son because he is my son and I love him more than words could say.
I celebrate his accomplishments, no matter how large or small they may be.
I celebrate him because he is wonderful.
I do not celebrate the part of his autism that will keep him from being safe and out of danger.

I write stories about my son because:

He is wonderful.
I’m very proud of him.
I’m very proud of his progress.
He makes me laugh every day.
He makes me smile every day.
He makes me worry every day.
I believe these stories shed a little bit of light on autism and the way his mind works – not all autism, but his.

I don’t believe anyone should be made to feel “less than”. I don’t consider my son “less than” but there is an issue. There is that life he could have had. Maybe it would not have been a better life, maybe it would have been, but at the very least he would have been able to understand it and navigate through it.

Individuals should be celebrated, not the diagnosis.

Like “Feeling Chastised”, my son will never be able to live on his own. He will never be able to take care of himself. He will not know when/if he’s being taken advantage of. He does not understand danger or safety. He is verbal but really not able to communicate if something might be wrong.

My suspicion is that many of these parents in celebration have younger children or children that can function at a higher level than mine. They still have hope of great progress, and they should have hope, there is always hope. I still have hope for more progress, but living in the real world I know that even though he continues to make progress, none of the issues listed above will improve enough that I will not spend every day and night worrying about what will happen to him when I am gone. This is the stuff our nightmares are made of. What’s going to happen to them when we’re all done celebrating autism? Our “kids” are going to outlive us, people. Who’s going to take care of them? Will they be cared for in the same fashion that we have cared for them? How drastically will their life change then? Think about it.

If I haven’t said it a hundred times, then let this be the hundredth; if I were to live forever, I would not change a thing about my son. He’s happy almost all of the time. He loves his life. He is in his own little happy world, but he won’t always be able to live in his own world, he will someday have to live in the real world. Then what?

When your child with Autism becomes an adult with Autism and your own mortality begins to slap you in the face, come back and talk to me then about this celebration we are supposed to be having.

Those of us with adult children that will not be able to live or navigate the world with out constant support, that have been in the trenches for many years, long before there was a “spectrum”, long before there were many of the services available today, deserve a little bit of respect and deserve to be able to voice our opinions as you are allowed to voice yours; to want something more than a celebration.

I believe in raising awareness. I believe in trying to make people understand Autism. I believe that INDIVIDUALS and accomplishments should be celebrated. I also believe some of us need more than that.

My only wish is to be able to die in peace knowing my son will be okay…….

“Looking Handsome” in the Princess Room

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

Let’s begin by saying that DC does not like to keep anything in his pockets. He will put his cell phone and wallet in his pockets; but they come out the second he gets inside the house…… nothing else. So much so that about a year ago when I asked him to put his gum wrapper in his pocket so he could use it when he was finished (instead of handing it to me straight out of his mouth or sticking it to the console in my car), he immediately threw away said piece of gum and hasn’t had a piece of gum since; all because I asked him to put the wrapper in his pocket.

Planning ahead:

He really doesn’t have any concept of planning ahead. He knows when he’s going somewhere or doing something, but he really can’t plan, for example, what he’s going to wear or what he should bring other than the pile of books that he travels with.

Two years ago we took a trip to Universal, Disney and Puerto Rico. DC has been to Disney many, many times so he knows what he wants to do and where he wants to go. He’s already got that all scheduled in his head. But if I asked him how many pairs of socks, pants, underwear and shirts we should pack for the week; he wouldn’t be able to figure that out.

Day one was spent traveling and visiting Downtown Disney

Dc in Downtown Disney

Day two we visited Universal Studios

DC at Universal

……and then on to Disney World, more specifically, the Magic Kingdom, DC’s favorite.

As I said earlier, he knows exactly where he wants to go and what he wants to do, so there was no question at some point we would be visiting the “Princess Room”.

After we made it though the line, outside the room, we waited inside the room with 4 or 5 other families to see the princesses.

While we were waiting behind the ropes, in full view of all of the princesses, DC gave me a bashful smile that I had never seen before. He slowly pulled a comb out of his pocket. Snow White happened to notice the comb and said “Did you bring that comb to look nice for me?” DC now very excited answered in his very loud happy voice, “Yes”, and the flapping started

– Good flapping

– Happy flapping

At this point all of the other parents, princesses and workers in the room were watching him (not staring, watching)

– Good watching

– “Awww, how cute” watching

DC combed his hair and announced, again in his very loud excited voice, that he was “Looking Handsome” (more Awwws). Now he was the hit of the room and the center of attention. The other parents were taking pictures of him, the Disney Video Guy (I never did find out what that was all about) was taping him. DC was eating it all up, and then he turned on the charm.

The other parents actually hovered as long as they could to see him when it was his turn with the princesses. In true DC fashion, he held their hand, took a bow and spun them around as if they were dancing at the ball. He added a new “move” to his list that year and began each conversation with a line from one of their songs.

He told Snow White that someday her prince will come.

Looking Handsome for Snow White

He told Belle that the was “something there that wasn’t there before”

Something there that wasn’t there before

…. And he informed Arora that he walked with her “once upon a dream”

Once upon a dream

– The boy knows his Disney songs!

Did I tape it? No, I was too busy getting teary eyed about the whole thing.

The Princesses were wonderful with him! They all made a big deal over him and he was the happiest “kid” in the park that day.

On the way out of the room the man with the video camera gave us passes for that night. The park was to stay open an extra 2 hours after the official close time for the people with passes. There was a party, music and no lines for the rides. It was a wonderful night.

Just think about this though, because I have thought about it so many times…..

*DC knew that he, without a doubt, would be going to the princess room .

*He thought ahead

*He put a comb in his POCKET BEFORE WE LEFT HOME

and

*He remembered to bring it with him to Disney World a full two days later!

This may not seem like a big deal to most of you but I’m sure that some of you will understand how mind-blowing this was for me!

Between you and me, I think the real reason for bringing the comb was that he wanted to comb “princess hair”, but the fact remains – he thought ahead.

One of these days I will tell you about his next meeting with Snow White a few years later…..