Walk Slowly

cruise 081 (2)

We’ve had some “weather” over the past week or so. Ice and snow are not on the list of DC’s favorite things. Usually I have to walk him out to his transportation if there is even a patch of snow or ice on the sidewalk – and believe me, he does not have a problem taking me down with him (or instead of him) if he falls or even just slips a little bit.  It is drama all of the way. Watching him walk down the sidewalk the other day (it was clear enough to “do it all by myself”), reminded me of the following post from right around this time two years ago.

So, from January 2014, we have…..

Literally Speaking

Raining Cats and Dogs

Raining Cats and Dogs

Twelve years ago, I wrote this:

“You can NEVER be too specific:

 While learning “grocery shopping” in the classroom; his plastic cart full of plastic food… he was told that it was time to “put everything on the counter to pay” – Instead of taking the food out of the cart, he lifted the entire cart onto the counter!”

And

“When you tell your child to pull his sweat pants down over his socks and he proceeds to PULL HIS PANTS DOWN from the waist to his ankles – You know you were not specific enough with your request.”

And a few years later, this:

My son loves to write little “stories” (he thinks they are stories, but they are usually just one line).

I had been home from work for a few days with the “Flu”.  It really didn’t occur to me that he had no idea what the “Flu” was and I wondered why he would laugh each time I mentioned it. He decided he would write one of his one-line “stories” for me to make me feel better ……

“Mom was so high”

It took me a few minutes…… but then I realized he thought I “Flew”

  • Then there was the time I said “Now listen closely” and he stuck his face one inch from mine…..
  •  He laughed for about a week after I told him it was time to “hit the road”.
  •  Or.. after the third round of kids whacked the piñata at his camp Halloween party, the Director said “Okay, DC, lets’ see you to tear it up” – he yanked it down and ripped it apart with his hands.

tear it up

There are so many other examples, but these few really stick in my head.

Needless to say, like many people with autism, DC takes everything literally.  Over the years, I have gotten much better at recognizing when something is said or read that taken literally will not make much sense to him. I always try to stop and explain what it means in that context, whether he asks or not.

He has made a great deal of progress in that area as well. He knows that the “flu” does not mean “flying”. He gets that “hit the road” means we have to get going. But he knows these things because they were explained to him, he is not able just figure it out himself – how could he?

Knowing this about my son, I suppose, when I told him to “walk slowly” on the sidewalk just in case there was ice (there wasn’t), I should have expected this:

“Funny Friday” Night

haha

Jokes…… not really a concept that DC understands most of the time. There are things that he finds funny when he is watching a movie or reading a book and physical comedy, of course is very funny to him – but to tell a joke and understand why it is funny is not always in his realm of understanding. He is very literal and jokes are oftentimes very abstract.  Not to say that he does not spend a good part of his time laughing – he does. I rarely know what he is laughing at and he, for the most part can not explain just what is so funny. It is just the things that are going on in his head.

There are times when he does surprise me…

As I am sitting here listening to him laugh at a scene from “The Big Comfy Couch” on YouTube – the same scene over and over and over again – and I am reminded of a time that he not only surprised me but his teachers as well.

Below is a post from two years ago about a that day. Since we seem to be having a funny Friday night here (over and over and over again), I decided it was as good a time as any to re-post……

******

“Funny Friday”

For the two years after “Graduation” DC attended a transition program through the school system at a local college.

I was visiting the school for a class event, one Friday afternoon and his teacher, “Mr. Disney” (as DC calls him) excitedly came over to me and asked “Did you help him with his jokes today?” Not knowing what he was talking about, I said “No, what jokes?”  One of the IA’s (“Para’s” to some of you) chimed in to tell me that he had told 3 jokes for “Funny Friday” that morning.

Mr. Disney went on to tell me that every Friday is “Funny Friday” and all of the students tell their favorite jokes at the morning meeting.

Okay…. Let’s pause here for a moment……

I don’t know how long (or if ever) it will take before anyone will understand that HE IS NOT GOING TO COME HOME AND TELL ME THESE THINGS! If someone else does not tell me, I am not going to know. If I had known about “Funny Friday” I would have helped him with some jokes, but unfortunately I was never told.

I was surprised that he actually TOLD a joke because DC’s idea of a joke – and it’s always the same – is:

“Ha, Ha, Ha! Funny Joke!”

Me:   “What’s the joke, Bud?”

“Monster!”

(Insert “cricket” sound here – that is it)

They proceeded to tell me the jokes he told that morning. He told them properly complete with a bow and…. they were actually funny – real jokes!

“Why did Bo Peep pour chocolate on her sheep?”

“She wanted a chocolate BAAAAAAAAR”

“Why can’t Cinderella play Soccer?”

“Because she ran away from the ball”

“What do they call a Fairy that doesn’t take a bath for a month?”

“Stinker-Bell”

He told honest – to – goodness JOKES!  After years of “Monster”, he actually told, not one joke, but three and UNDERSTOOD why they were funny!

Later, I ran into the Interim Dean of Health Sciences, of the college who couldn’t wait to tell me about the three jokes that DC shared that morning. Everyone was very impressed, to say the least!

Still I had no idea where he found these jokes.

About a week later, “Mr. Disney” finally got DC to tell him where he found his material.

Actually, he showed him……

After asking him all week, DC went to the computer, typed “Disney jokes” in the search engine and found a web-site full of Disney jokes.

He memorized them and had them ready for “Funny Friday”!

He was able to figure out on his own that “Monster” wasn’t cutting it for “Funny Friday” and he needed better jokes. He went about finding them himself, remembered them and had them ready for Friday!

“Monster” ?? Still his favorite joke.

(Graduation – I do not know what it is like everywhere else, but here school-age for SPED is 3 to 21 years. DC “graduated” from the High School after spending 4 years there. Having two years left of school, after his senior year – the options were to let him stay at the High School or to have him outplaced into an appropriate transition program. Fortunately the town put together this transition program right before DC was ready to graduate.)

 

 

 

Not so “literally speaking”

We all know that DC is very literal (see Literally Speaking)  in his speech and way of thinking. Aside from his black and white,  no-gray-area way of communicating and understanding and his just one mumbled word responses, his manner of speaking is at times very formal, for lack of a better word. Much of his language stems directly from the many books he reads and movies he watches.
He calls the cabinet a ‘cub – board ‘ <cupboard> (emphasis on ‘board’), not because he thinks it is funny,  because that is what it is. That is what he’s learned from his books.

For example, when he knows I happen to have a Friday off from work and he wants me to come to lunch at his program –

“*Vickie, would you be so kind to join me for lunch on Friday at <insert the name of his program>” ~ the whole name please, not the Acronym used by the everyone else ~

 –  (*yes, he calls me Vickie from time to time. In his mind, he is an adult and that is what he should do. It does not bother me in the least. Last night, for some reason, it was “Ms. <Last name> and that is fine too)

He does ask me from time to time, what a word means, not that he will incorporate the word into his vocabulary, he would just like to know. Every once in a while he will make a connection with one word and other in his head. I am always in awe when he manages to do this on this own. This seems to be happening much more lately.

For many years “Wonderful” was his choice when he had a good time or liked something very much. He has started replacing “Wonderful” with “Terrific”. Not a huge deal, but he figured out that it means the same thing and it is a little less formal than “We had a wonderful time”.

A few weeks ago, I was telling DC that we were out of something, I don’t remember what it was at the time, but it was something he was expecting to have for dinner. I explained that we were all out,  it was my mistake, I didn’t know we were out (things tend to go over better with him when it is my fault :).

His reply???

“No problem”

NO PROBLEM!!!!!!

I have never heard him use that phrase, ever. Somewhere along the line he figured out what it means and used it appropriately.

A while back DC and I were having a movie night. DC was waiting in the living room to watch “Maleficent” and I was in the kitchen getting the pizza ready ~ actually I was in the kitchen bleeding all over the counter trying to find a Band-Aid. Not an easy task with “Mr. Band-Aid” in the house – but that is beside the point. Searching for a band-aid box that was not full of band-aid wrappers but no band-aids and mumbling under my breath –  from the living room I heard; “Gee, I wonder what Vickie is up to”.

GEE????

IS UP TO ???

I wrote that one down as soon as DC brought me a Band-Aid from his hidden stash.

In my last post you may have heard “We have to get moving”.

GET MOVING  instead of  we have to go!!!!

I asked him to help me open a Peanut Butter jar – he tried, but he could not get it to open either.

“It won’t budge”

BUDGE?????

Let’s not forget the day he was “in sympathy” for sneaking chips. There have been so many more, but you get the picture. It throws me a little bit every time he comes out with a new one, but it is exciting. It shows me that he is paying more attention to what goes on around him and he is listening to much more than he lets on.

There are still many literal, black and white moments and DC still very rarely refers to himself as “me”.

Recently at a Best Buddy walk, both of his Buddies asked him where he got the Star Trek shirt he was wearing…..

“DC’s room” 

 

 

 

 

Literally Speaking

Raining Cats and Dogs

Raining Cats and Dogs

Twelve years ago, I wrote this:

“You can NEVER be too specific:

 While learning “grocery shopping” in the classroom; his plastic cart full of plastic food… he was told that it was time to “put everything on the counter to pay” – Instead of taking the food out of the cart, he lifted the entire cart onto the counter!”

And

“When you tell your child to pull his sweat pants down over his socks and he proceeds to PULL HIS PANTS DOWN from the waist to his ankles – You know you were not specific enough with your request.”

And a few years later, this:

My son loves to write little “stories” (he thinks they are stories, but they are usually just one line).

I had been home from work for a few days with the “Flu”.  It really didn’t occur to me that he had no idea what the “Flu” was and I wondered why he would laugh each time I mentioned it. He decided he would write one of his one-line “stories” for me to make me feel better ……

“Mom was so high”

It took me a few minutes…… but then I realized he thought I “Flew”

  • Then there was the time I said “Now listen closely” and he stuck his face one inch from mine…..
  •  He laughed for about a week after I told him it was time to “hit the road”.
  •  Or.. after the third round of kids whacked the piñata at his camp Halloween party, the Director said “Okay, DC, lets’ see you to tear it up” – he yanked it down and ripped it apart with his hands.

Tear it up

There are so many other examples, but these few really stick in my head.

Needless to say, like many people with autism, DC takes everything literally.  Over the years, I have gotten much better at recognizing when something is said or read that taken literally will not make much sense to him. I always try to stop and explain what it means in that context, whether he asks or not.

He has made a great deal of progress in that area as well. He knows that the “flu” does not mean “flying”. He gets that “hit the road” means we have to get going. But he knows these things because they were explained to him, he is not able just figure it out himself – how could he?

Knowing this about my son, I suppose, when I told him to “walk slowly” on the sidewalk just in case there was ice (there wasn’t), I should have expected this: