#StopDropAnd……… (just for fun)

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

Last week I received an invitation to participate in a pod-cast. I won’t mention the name here as I didn’t ask for permission to write about it, but the overview given to me was:

I want to provide fierce women like me soul food, share
stories, exchange the good, the bad and the ugly and create an
environment where we discuss the hard stuff.

Immediately, I felt sick to me stomach.

My reply:

Thank you so much for the offer. Although I would LOVE the free publicity,
I am not a public speaker, when I say “not a public speaker”, I mean to the
point where I can’t talk at all, my mind goes blank, and if anything does come out
– it does not make any sense. I am much better, and tend to stay behind the
scenes. But thank you for the offer

(not very ‘fierce’ at all)

Coincidently, I had just finished reading a #StopDropAnd…. type challenge that one of my Instagram friends posted about herself, called “20 things about me”. Many of the items she listed rang so familiar with me and very well could have been written about me. I was thinking about my own list, and the public speaking phobia was definitely one of the “about me’s” I would have listed. It was odd that I had just been thinking about this subject, due to an instagram post, when the e-mail came in.

This little coincidence led me to think about all of the #StopDropAnd tags I’ve received – seriously, if you haven’t figured it out yet, there is no rhyme or reason to the way my mind works, or how one thought leads to the other, so just go with it………………

In the event you are not familiar with the #StopDropand hashtag/game, it works this way:
You are tagged in a friend’s photo to #StopDropAnd do something.

Just for fun and because I have three different posts that aren’t going to be finished today, I am supplying a sample of some of the #StopDropand ‘s that I have been tagged for:

#StopDropAndSelfie – there is nothing more frightening to me than having that camera turned around on myself. I have done it accidentally a few times and seriously…. I don’t need to see that, no one does.
The following is my collection of #StopDropAndSelfie (s) – and no, I did not follow “the rules”.

: Self explainatory

: also self explainatory

: “technically” not a selfie – DC took this of me and it was on my phone

: Also not a new selfie, already on my phone

One friend that I tagged was reprimanded by his daughter. Unbeknownst to him (or me), there are apparently rules that govern selfies that he was not following:

You do not take selfies at night
Find your best facial side and make that side the main side
Girls tilt head 45 degrees and up, Guys straight on and up
Hold camera in front of you and up to the right (or left, if that is your best side)
Don’t put weird or distracting objects behind you
Make sure there’s good lighting in front of you
Don’t over do the filters

but…… she helped him out anyway. We learn something new everyday.

#StopDropAndConfess –

My confessions:
1. I have a serious peanut butter addiction
2. David Boreanaz is the handsomest man alive
3. I also have a serious thing for Colin Ferguson
One friend that I tagged had an issue with the peanut butter jars being upside-down and others right-side-up, complete with hash tag #TheyAreComingToTakeMeAway – that may very well be one of his confessions .

There is a perfectly logical explanation: Upside-down are unopened – stored that way so that the oil mixes. The others have been opened. Why is there more than one jar open??? You will have to talk to DC about that. There always seems to be more than one of everything open in this house – he just can not use the end of anything…..

#List10ThingsThatMakeYouHappy

1 DC’s “Good Morning, Mom”
2 DC’s smile
3.DC’s hugs
4. Doug
5. Coffee, Coffee, Coffee
6. My friends – they are the best!
7. Some of my family
8. A day off
9. Meeting DC for lunch at his job
10. Of course, my IG friends

IG Post from June 2014

But does he know……

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

I’ve been asked quite a few times – twice just this past week, if I have ever told DC that he has autism and if so how did I approach the subject. Most of the questions came from mothers with children that are just beginning to or do already realize that they are different from their classmates and friends.

To be perfectly honest, I really do not think that DC is aware that he is different – I do not know if this is a good thing – at the moment I am going with – yes, but I really do not think he sees any differences between himself and other ‘men’ his age, or anyone for that matter. I really do not believe age is a factor in anything he thinks about or notices. I don’t think age means anything to him at all.

That being said, it is never perfectly clear just what he might understand and what he does not. I really do not know what goes on in his head at times. I Know that just because he doesn’t seem to notice or understand, does not always mean that he doesn’t. Going on the small chance that he may actually know that he is different… yes, I have told him. I have told him many times, since he was very young.

We don’t have “sit down and talk about it” sessions because he becomes overwhelmed with too much information. He needs examples, he needs to see something. We also can not talk about it too often – when we talk about anything too often, it makes him anxious – he thinks something is wrong. I never want to give him the impression that anything is ‘wrong’ with him. He doesn’t need that.

I have to take the opportunities when they come. Because he is very visual, I try to approach the subject when we are watching TV or reading something that happens to have a character with Autism. The first time I brought it up to him, we were watching TV.

I remember starting out by pointing out the character.

“DC, do you see that boy?”

“yes”

“He has autism. Do you know that you have autism too”

“yes” (he answers “yes” to just about everything)

“Do you see the way he flaps his arms? Who else does that?”

“You” (pronoun confusion – ‘you’ instead of ‘me’)

“Autism means you and the boy may think about things a little bit differently than Mom and some of your friends. Can you say ‘Autism’?”

“Autism” (usually I can type his pronunciations, but I can not type his pronunciation of the word Autism)

We’ve gone through this scenario many times – arms flapping – loud noises – whatever happens to be going on with a character or story.

We talk about it when we participate in an Autism Walk or fundraiser. We talk about which of his friends have autism. I can not get into too much into detail with him, I just point things out as they come up – a character, a fundraiser, his friends….

I point it out to him when he is watching his sign language sing-a-long DVD’s. I explain to him that his autism made it harder for him to speak at first (he was non-verbal until he was 7), this is why he went to speech therapy with Liza for so many years.

He was always very happy to see Liza every week. He worked hard.

(He LOVES Liza)

Before he learned to speak, he used sign-language.

He was always happy to see Sandi for sign. He worked hard with her as well.

(He LOVES Sandi)

Speech therapy and sign language were “good” things in his mind – fun time. This can be directly attributed to the insight and resourcefulness of both Liza and Sandi and the way they choose to make the process fun by working from his interests and incorporating them into his sessions. I am 100% sure that Liza can recite the “Wizard of Oz”, in every variation to this day. They made him happy.

We’ve discussed* it many, many times over the years and in many different ways, but for a boy who remembers everything, he can not give me the word “Autism” at any other time. Unless I ask him to repeat it for me, he does not seem to even remember ever hearing the word. This just strengthens my belief that he really does not understand any of it. He does not know that he’s different and for now, that is fine with me. My goal here is not to make him feel that he is different.

So why do I continue to talk about it?

On the chance that he does recognize this now or later on, I don’t want him to wonder and not be able to communicate the question to me. This isn’t the sort of question he would ever be able to communicate.

And though I am relatively sure he does not understand, it is possible one day he may understand, or partially understand, but over and above all of that, if he were to hear “Autism” or “Autistic” elsewhere I want to be sure he doesn’t think it something that is “bad” or “wrong with him”.

I don’t and will not harp on it – I don’t feel the need to have those long heart – to – heart flowery discussions about it. He is happy, he knows he is loved. I will continue to mention it from time to time when the occasion arises, just so the word is recognizable to him and just in case he should ever wonder. If there comes a time when it seems that he might need to know more then I will try to explain it a little more in-depth or try to come up with a different way to explain it to him. For now, he seems to be just fine knowing what he knows and that is really all I want.

I wish I had a better answer for the people who asked…

Have I told him? – Yes.

But does he ‘know’?

I may never know for sure….

Re-Blog from Wendy Jane’s Soul Shake – Never Will Forget You….

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

Wendy is a friend and fellow blogger from my hometown. Although neither of us lives there anymore, it is our roots, it is still “home”.

Wendy was kind enough to re-post a piece I wrote a few weeks back “Never Will Forget You – A Tribute to Avonte Oquendo”.

Wendy does not write about autism, her followers are very likely not all Autism Moms, Dads or families as are many of mine are. To share her tagline:

One white woman’s curious obsession with race.

Follow my quest to connect across color lines.

The piece she has posted today does include an additional paragraph for those that may not be aware of the story.

(Wendy also does not have a re-blog button on her blog, so I have to re-blog it this way 🙂

After you read Wendy’s re-post, please take some time to read some of her other posts. As I said, she does not write about autism, but we really are allowed to read non-Autism related stories and blogs once in a while, aren’t we? I really think you will enjoy her blogs. I always do!

So thank you very much Wendy and now I am under immense pressure to live up to the introduction you wrote for me………..

Re-Posting Tribute to Avonte Oquendo, by Vickie – Via Wendy Jane’s Soul Shake

A friend, Vickie, is a stupendous supporter of WJSS, and by that I mean she retweets every single one of my blog posts, and actually reads them, and comments, and I truly appreciate her for doing so. Vickie, from my hometown, has a fantastic blog of her own, Taking It A Step At A Time, where she writes about her adventures, and challenges of being a mom to her 23 year-old son, D.C. who has autism.

On her blog, Vickie shares personal stories of what it’s like living day-to-day with a child with autism, and while there are many challenges that parents with children without autism never have to think about, what shines through Vickie’s stories, are the sheer joy D.C. experiences each day, much of which is driven by Vickie’s love and devotion to him.

Please Continue Reading

Secrets, Surprises, a Little Bit of Faith and Pizza…………

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

This past February all of the Winter Guard parents were asked to contribute a short story or memory about our Winter Guard Director. She would be celebrating her “-Mumble, mumble -th” Birthday in March. Her son wanted to put together a book of memories for her.

DC has been a participant with this special needs Winter Guard team for 6 or 7 years. He really loves it, even though at first he had a really tough time focusing and rarely did anything close to the moves that everyone else was doing. He didn’t care. He wanted to wave his flag. He has improved very much over the years and still enjoys participating. He loves the performances most of all. He loves the attention – he loves the applause. He is the only one to take a bow while the rest of the team is in the “end of performance” pose. (I am sure there is a proper and official name for that, but “end of performance pose” is the best I can do)

I wrote up my memory, DC drew a picture and we sent it along to the director’s son. Had I been really thinking, I would not have told DC about the birthday. It was still 3 weeks away and DC is always very excited about birthdays. DC also does not understand “surprise” or “secret”.

A secret, is DC whispering in a raspy voice louder than his already very loud voice.

A secret is pizza for breakfast.

There are times, not often, but there are times, when we have left-over pizza in the house. When there is left over pizza, DC loves to have it for breakfast. This happens all of once every couple of months, but I know my son. If anyone were to ask him what he had for breakfast, he will answer pizza. If someone should ask him the next day, he will answer “pizza”, not because he had it again, but because 1) That is what he would have wanted to have 2) It becomes a standard answer because he is tired of answering questions 3) That was his favorite breakfast that week so that’s his answer and he is sticking with it.

Not wanting people to think I give him pizza every morning, we decided to call it “Secret Breakfast”. Well…. as I said, DC doesn’t understand the concept of a secret, so anytime we go out with friends for pizza, or we are at a party where pizza is being served, he always asks for “Secret Breakfast” – then I have to explain what “Secret Breakfast” is to my friends or other parents, (because of course, they ask – wouldn’t you?) completely defeating the purpose of the secret part of “Secret Breakfast”. At this point “Secret Breakfast” is just something we call pizza, people now just ask him if he wants to take some home for “Secret Breakfast”, and yes, they also call it “Secret Breakfast” when they offer.

A surprise pretty much runs along the same lines as a secret. If we buy a gift, and I tell him not to say anything because it is a surprise, the very first thing he will do when he sees the person that we bought the gift for is:

– Go over to that person, point at them and says (to me) “Don’t tell anyone, surprise, shhh” and many times he will even tell me what the surprise is. I suppose because he is addressing me and not the person, he thinks he is not giving it all away.

Knowing all of this, I should have realized that the next time we went to Winter Guard practice, he would ask about Mrs. F’s birthday. It was still two weeks away. I was worried that if he mentioned it in front of her, she would know that something was in the works. There would be no reason for DC to know that her birthday was coming. I reminded him over and over and held my breath for the next two weeks. Fortunately he did not give it away, not for lack of trying though – he did mention it a number of times at practice but luckily she was not close enough to hear it.

I saved the story to post at a later date, after her birthday. My mind, being the steel trap that it is, filed it and forgot to post it.

We were out tonight for pizza with DC and his friends when DC asked for Secret Breakfast and I remembered the post – because this is the way my mind works.

Here is the “Little Bit of Faith” portion of this post.

Happy very belated Birthday, “Mrs. F”!

The one event that always sticks out in my mind is the High School Ice Cream Social performance in 2011. The performance was a last-minute addition to the Team’s schedule. Being so last-minute, many of the Buddies were not available to perform with our children.

The Team had never rehearsed, never mind performed without their Buddies before, so this was something totally out of their comfort zone. But there we were anyway, with 3 buddies. Mrs. F. had faith that they would be able to do this. I am not sure that many of the parents had as much faith, but Mrs. F. did.

There was a little bit of time to do a few quick rehearsals before the show but as I said, this was a very new experience for them – a few quick rehearsals without their buddies would be like starting from scratch. Mrs. F. gave them a pep talk before and after each run-though and made it very clear to all of them that they could do this!

She gathered them around for one more pep talk before they went out to perform. She believed in them so they believed in themselves. They knew they could do this!

And they DID! The show went off without a hitch. They gave a fabulous performance! How proud they were to be able to do this without help! Mrs. F. had faith and in turn, so did the Team (and the parents)…… All it took was a little bit of faith…….. And THANK YOU for the faith you have in, and the encouragement you give to our children!

There is no one better! Thank you for everything you do……..

Never Will Forget You – Tribute to Avonte Oquendo

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

Recently I had the immense privilege and honor to listen to the beautiful and heartbreaking song written in memory of Avonte Oquendo, by his uncle, Rocopera. Even over the telephone, it was apparent that the love he has for this child is immeasurable. The pain of this loss will never be healed.

“This song comes from a broken heart”

His heart IS broken – all of our hearts are broken. What happened to this beautiful child should never have happened. What happened is every parents’ nightmare. Those of us that have children with special needs know this fear all too well. We know that simple things like just putting your child on a school bus and sending him off to school can be terrifying. They are not with us, we are not in control, we are not there to protect and take care of them. As the mother of an adult child with autism, I know this fear. I live this fear. – We all live this fear.

Avonte’s disappearance drove that fear home for all of us. Avonte’s story is not something that happened to one boy or one family in New York – it happened to all of us in the Autism Community. A tragedy like this can happen anywhere – and it does happen everywhere.

“Never Will Forget You – A Tribute to Avonte Oquendo” was written not only as a memorial to the nephew he loved so deeply, but as a vehicle to raise awareness about Autism in general. Rocopera has spent the better part of his adult life advocating for/with the Autism community. His own son is on the Autism Spectrum.

In an effort to work through his pain, Rocopera has been spending much of his time writing and producing “Never Forget You”. He is also tirelessly working on and producing a documentary chronicling the events of that horrific 3 1/2 months. A memorial at the site is in the planning stages, pending the approval of Mayor De Blasio. Rockopera needs to raise awareness, he needs to know that Avonte will never be forgotten.

In an earlier post, I wrote:

As it has been said, Avonte, brought an entire city together. His disappearance brought an often, very separated Autism community together. It cast a spotlight on the problem of wandering/elopement of Autistic children and adults. He has raised awareness to the issues that many families face in trying to keep their children safe. Our children should be safe, at all costs…………. Avonte should have been safe in school.

– Avonte Oquendo should be memorialized, in any and every way possible.

“Never Will Forget You – A Tribute to Avonte Oquendo” will be released on iTunes 5 days before the October 4th anniversary of his disappearance, with all of the proceeds to be donated to credible Autism charities.

We will be posting more information about all of these projects in the weeks to come, but in the meantime, please help us spread the word about the release of this beautifully written and performed, tribute to Avonte.

I promise you that once you hear “Never Will Forget You”, you will never forget this haunting and so very moving song……………

……………………..as we will never forget Avonte.

9/12/14 –

Many Thanks to:

One Loco Mommy

Wendy Jane’s Soul Shake

Autism and Christianity

Soaring with Autism

For re-blogging and re-posting –

Guest Post: Raising Awareness in the Face of Tragedy – #NeverWillForgetYou – By Gizelle Tolbert

Guest Post: Spreading Awareness; Spreading the Word; #NeverWillForgetYou – by Gizelle Tolbert

Re-Posting Tribute to Avonte Oquendo, by Vickie

The CALL TO ACTION – A Memorial for Avonte

ATTENTION NYC PARENTS : Avonte’s Law – Rally JUNE 12, 2014!

Second Star to the Right……… and hang a left.

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

DC and I were driving to the store this past weekend. He was listening to the Peter Pan CD that he had checked out of the library a few days earlier. Like many of the books he borrows each week, he already owns this CD, but still he must check it out from the library. The “library” CD’s are to be listened to in the car only – this is one of those “official DC rules” that he makes up in his head. I’m sure there are very good reasons for the rules he comes up with, but I really don’t know what these reasons are or where these rules come from, but he follows them to the letter – always.

DC has every version of Peter Pan imaginable. He has the old black and white Mary Martin version, the Cathy Rigby version, the Disney version, the non-animated version, Peter Pan that came out a few years ago (maybe more – I have no sense of time), Finding Neverland, the sequels to the Disney version and Hook. He has copies of the soundtracks to all of them as well. The only Peter Pan themed movie he would never watch was Hook. I do not know why but he refused to watch it. It happens to be my favorite version of Peter Pan so I really tried for years to get him to watch it. I’ve had to watch Peter Pan for more than 20 years, and at times it would have been nice to watch the version I enjoy.

Obviously this was not one of “DC’s rules”.

Somewhere along the line DC discovered that Robin Williams – the voice of the Genie, was in Hook – that was all he needed to figure out and now it is also one of his favorites. Everything is related, and once he is able to relate a character to another he likes, he’s “hooked”.

(One day I will write a post about how everything is related. It probably won’t make a lot of sense to you, but it will sure be fun for me to write)

After listening to “Tender Shepard” six times, I told DC he had to move on to a different song. He did, but we soon moved back to “Tender Shepard”. This song is from the Mary Martin/Cathy Rigby version of Peter Pan. This version seems to be his all-time favorite. Zoning out while listening to this song….AGAIN, I started to think about Hurricane Irene back in 2011, because

……. it is all related.

It was Friday, August 26, 2011. I was on my way to my first appointment of the day to look at a few MORE day programs. This is the way every Friday that summer had been spent. I generally have Fridays off during the summer so it was a perfect opportunity to go and check out day/work programs for DC, as he would be finished with school and his transition program the following June (2012). On the way there, I received a phone call from Doug.

“Listen, we are supposed to be getting a big storm here over the weekend – do you want to just take off for Vegas for the weekend?”

“WHAT???”

Many of you know that DC is terrified of storms. I don’t think it is the actual storm, it is the fear of losing power, that scares him. This storm was supposed to be a big one – a hurricane.

Okay….. it’s Friday morning.

I’m on my way to a meeting.

I can’t make this kind of decision that quickly- I just can’t think about this now.

But, I can’t wait too long because all of the flights will be booked.(This is me, not thinking about this now)

But, if we lose power I’m going to be sorry we didn’t go.

I have to concentrate on looking at programs, I can’t think about this now.

If we fly there, what if they close the airports later and we can’t get back on time for work and school? (Still not thinking about this now)

Maybe we can go somewhere closer?

What if we decide on somewhere closer and the storm shifts direction?

I called him back and suggested that he try to find somewhere closer and I would consider it.

After my first meeting, and failing miserably at “I can’t think about this right now” – I called Doug back. He was checking the weather and the path of the storm and decided on Pennsylvania – it may be rainy there but it should not be as bad as they were reporting it could get here.

After my third meeting, I went home, packed quickly (I must say I did a much better job packing with no notice than when I plan for a scheduled vacation) and when DC came home Doug came over, picked us up and we were off. I didn’t have any great expectations about this weekend. I really thought the weather would be bad and we would be sitting in the hotel room most of the time, and I did explain this to DC. As long as he was going to a hotel (his favorite) and there would be power, television and food, he was all for it!

We did consider, although it was never mentioned to DC -Hershey Park – weather permitting. A scheduled trip to Hershey Park a few months earlier had been a bit of a disaster – something I will not be writing about – and a do-over would be fantastic. But as I said, I didn’t have any expectations at all.

Arriving in PA, DC was happy to be in a hotel room. He took his favorite spot at the desk and happily edited his books on Friday night.

Saturday was a little bit overcast but a very nice day. We decided to take our chances with the Hershey Park do-over.

We could not have planned for a better day or a better time! DC got to go on all of the rides he missed during the “de-aster” (DC-speak) trip.

There was a total of 5 minutes of rain while we were at the park, even that didn’t really bother him as it normally would. It cleared up quickly and we continued on exploring the rest of the park.

Onward to the “Chocolate Factory” (Chocolate World). DC would happily skip the park and just go to Chocolate World. “Chocolate Factory” = Willy Wonka. There is not a single “Wonka” anything there, but it’s a Chocolate Factory and all Chocolate Factories belong to Willy Wonka, period…. DC’s rule.

We almost didn’t make it there on our first trip, and when we did, I held my breath the entire time. It was wonderful to be able to take him back there relaxed and breathing normally.

On the way back to the hotel, I spotted a sign outside of the Hershey Theater for Peter Pan staring Cathy Rigby. We had taken DC to see Cathy Rigby in Peter Pan when he was much younger and he just loved it. I noticed that there was a performance scheduled for Sunday afternoon and Sunday evening. The forecast was calling for rain on Sunday so we thought we’d check to see if there were tickets still available for Sunday afternoon. We decided to check on line when we got back to the hotel. I didn’t want to mention it to DC until we knew, so walking into the box office was not an option.

It turns out that there were tickets available!

On Sunday morning on the way to breakfast, making his trip the “best trip ever” – he found a bookstore.

The play was early enough so that we could still leave at a reasonable time to get home and sleep before work for me and the first day of school for DC on Monday.

DC loved the show, loved it! They announced during the curtain call that Cathy Rigby would be available for photos and autographs in the lobby immediately after the show was over! Could this get any better for him?!

If I had planned this trip for months, it could not have worked out better than this last minute, impromptu, Hurricane trip worked out!

DC met Cathy Rigby, had his picture taken with her, got her autograph and sat on her lap – I did try to stop him from sitting on her lap because DC is a BIG boy, but I was too late and she didn’t seem to mind. Her signed poster still hangs in his room.

How much better could all of this have worked out? I am still amazed about how smoothly this weekend went.

After the play we headed home, from our “Escape from Irene” weekend.

We arrived to find that the first day of school had already been canceled due to the power outages. It turned out that our side of town never lost power at all.

Two months later, we wouldn’t be so lucky, but for now we had just returned home from – in DC’s words – “The Best Trip Ever”.

The Great Band-Aid Obsession

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

“All children with Autism love stickers”

—- DC hates stickers! Hates them, but still people insist on giving him stickers, mailing him stickers and putting stickers on him! In the past, anytime we were at an event where a sticker was required, I always had to place it on the back of his shirt – he just could not stand it on the front (he wasn’t thrilled about having it on his back either, but he could tolerate it a little bit more there). Even now that he can tolerate a sticker on his shirt, I will hear about it the entire time it is there and he removes it the second we leave the event.

“All children with Autism love Legos”

—- DC hates Legos! Hates them, but still people insist on giving him Legos (not as much lately, but definitely when he was younger)

“All children with Autism love Minecraft”

—-DC hates Minecraft.

“All children with Autism love things that spin”

Okay, I’ll give you that one…………..

Other than his books and movies, the one thing DC really loves are Band-Aids. I am not completely sure that Band-Aids are on the list of what “Every child with Autism loves” – it is possible, I do not know, but I know that DC just loves them.

I believe the main reason for this obsession, as I mentioned in an earlier post, is that he’s never actually had the need for a Band-Aid – that I can recall.

I mean, I have really been lucky (still knocking wood), so much so that we’ve never had to use a Band-Aid. He loves Band-Aids and wants to wear them so much that he just wears them for no reason, or invents a reason the wear them. The one and only time he cut himself when he fell off his bike – yes, he somehow managed to tip over an adult three-wheeled bike – he was so excited to have a big raspberry on his chest, he wasn’t concerned about the fall, he just wanted a Band-Aid. He was so crushed that the raspberry was much too big for a Band-Aid, that I had to make up a reason to apply one to his leg, just to make him happy.

Band-Aids, especially “character-themed Band-Aids” are on his “odd gifts list” along with the rolls of scotch tape, mentioned in an earlier blog.”

This has been an off and on obsession with him since he was very young. Then, he seemed to forget about it for a few years, not that he would ever pass up an opportunity to wear a Band-Aid if he happened upon some, but it wasn’t a daily thing.

But now for some reason, the obsession has returned!

It started slowly…….

Rounding out the Collection, we have Mickey Mouse (again, no injury)

…..just a Band-Aid here and there once in a while, but it has slowly escalated into this:

We were in a department store not too long ago and DC came across a table filled with cases, yes cases, filled with 12 boxes of multiple sizes of Band-Aids.

One would have thought he’d found the Holy Grail!

“Mom! Band-Aids! P-LLLLL-EEEEE-ASE!”

– Yes, we bought them………

The ‘I want a Band-Aid’ hints begin almost every night with…

“Mom. my leg is itchy”

“Oh, really? I don’t see anything”

“Mom, my arm is itchy and my leg is itchy”

He doesn’t always come right out and ask for a Band-Aid, at times he will, but usually he will just continue to tell me his arm, leg or foot is itchy, until I finally give in and say…

“Okay, go ahead”

Then off he goes to apply his 3, 4 or more Band-Aids.

The new swag

A few people have wondered and even asked why I “let” him do this.

Why? Seriously, these are the kind of issues that some people think I should be worried about?

I choose my battles and to me, this is not a battle. This is so far removed from a battle, that it is not even worth talking about – with him, that is. Apparently it needs to be explained to others.

He is not hurting anyone. Most of them are applied to his arms or legs – with the exception of one that he put across his nose the other day due to a pimple. It doesn’t interfere with his “work”, his activities or his life in general. It makes him happy. There are so many other/bigger issues to worry about. My time was never spent trying to make him conform to what other people may think to be “normal”. Safety issues – yes, his ability to navigate social or public situations – yes, communication – yes, independence – yes, life skills – yes but these little things that some people seem hell-bent to correct – no!

I could live without the Band-Aid wrappers all over the house…

DC calls me “Vickie” quite often. I think it is because he is always being told that he is an adult now, so therefore he should be allowed to call me by my first name. I doesn’t bother me in the least – I actually think it is kind of funny. This is one of those “connections” that he’s made in his head – he’s an adult, so he can use first names. I don’t like to discourage these connections that he makes. But some people seem to be horrified by it. Why? He knows I’m his mother. I know he loves me (he tells me all day long). He does still call me Mom more than half of the time and even if he did not, how is this interfering with his progress, his life, his job or anything for that matter? It does not.

I always find it a bit funny when other people point out these little “nothing” issues as ‘something I really need to work on’.

So, back to the Band-Aid situation….

Having just said that he only applies them to his arms, legs or hands……(and apparently he also has a stash in the kitchen, I knew nothing about)……….

please read my Facebook Status 8/6/14:

Last night I was on the phone with an automated system. I had to tell DC more than once to stay quiet because this system picks up any noise. After the fourth attempt, it was clear that the system was not going to take my information , so I gave up. I turned around to find DC with a Band-Aid over his mouth. I guess he didn’t trust himself to keep quiet on his own

And no, I did not get a picture, I was too busy laughing.

Even though I would ever advocate putting a Band-Aid over anyone’s mouth, and never would I encourage him to put a Band-Aid over his own mouth, I was still pretty impressed with his ability to make that connection in his head.

Progress and connections at times come out of the strangest of situations…………………

“To Boldly Go……”

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

To Bodly Go….

I confess…

I admit it…

I am just a big old Sci-fi geek from way back. I watched the first episode of Star Trek back in 1966/1967 (?) and I was hooked – for life.

The first “sign” that DC learned when he was very young (for those of you that may not know, DC was non-verbal until he was 7 years old) was the “Live Long and Prosper” sign. If and when he saw a picture of Mr. Spock or heard him mentioned, he used that sign.

Today, he is verbal but will still, at times use his signs in conjunction with his speech – that “Mr. Spock” sign has come to represent Star Trek in general for him and he still uses it.

Coincidently, DC just happened to be born on William Shatner’s birthday (not planned – I swear)

Before the days when Star Trek costumes were available to purchase – DC’s second Halloween.

Last October, we finally made it to New York Comic-Con. I was nervous – it was so crowded, but the hope of meeting Felicia Day, kept DC pretty much on track. He also got to meet William Shatner and the Real Mike Tee Vee. All were very nice to him and he was very, very happy.

A few years back a friend of mine told me about “Shore Leave“,an event held in Baltimore every August. It is smaller than ComicCon and the original plan was to try this first, see how DC managed it and then move on to the bigger ‘Con’ in NY at a later date. Somehow we ended up doing it in reverse. But, since DC did so well at ComicCon we decided Shore Leave would be a breeze.

We left on Thursday afternoon as soon as DC came home from his work program. Our 5 hour drive to Baltimore somehow turned into an 8 hour haul. We opted not to stay at the hotel where the event was being held as we were planning on doing a few other things in Baltimore while we were there and I really thought it would be just too much for DC. We had reservations at the Holiday Inn – Timonium. We finally arrived a little bit after 11pm.

The man at the desk checked us in to room 717. We headed up to the 7th floor in the slowest elevator known to man – reverse warp speed. We opened the door to room 717 and found that the door was bolted from the inside and soon a man’s face was looking at us through the 6 inch space in the door. He wanted to know what we were doing and why we had a key to his room. We explained that we had just checked in and this was the room we were given. He explained that HE had just checked into this room moments before. DC does not understand this, he wants to “go to the room”.

Fortunately a hotel employee was in the hallway and called down to the desk. He got the desk clerk to assign us a different room on the same floor, let us in with his master-key and went down to switch out the keys for us. We were now checked into room 725. At about 11:45, the room phone rang. It was the desk clerk. He has forgotten our name (??!!) – we had reservations so he should have all of that information, but I gave him our name again. At midnight, the phone rang. It was the desk clerk once again, this time calling to tell us he would have someone slip free breakfast coupons under our door for our inconvenience. We thanked him and hoped this would be the end of the phone calls for the evening.

We spent Friday at the Inner Harbor. DC of course spotted the Barnes and Noble and Hard Rock “Caf” (DC-speak) so, you bet we had to visit both places. It was a nice day and we had a very nice time.

We got back to the room at about 4pm to discover that no one had come to clean. I thought that was odd, but given the debacle of the night before, I really didn’t think too much about it at the time. We would be heading back out in an hour so there wasn’t much point to calling anyone to clean at that time of day.

Reading the Shore Leave schedule, I noticed that there was a “Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock” tournament at 6pm. DC loves the Big Bang Theory and thinks “Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock” is the most hysterical thing he’s ever heard. He does not really know what it means, the words are just so funny to him. I thought if we attended the tournament, he would see exactly what it is…. a game. I didn’t think he would actually understand the game, but at the very least he might understand what they are talking about in the show.

: Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock

When we first walked in, the moderator was explaining the rules, reading from a very confusing T-shirt, complete with diagrams and pictures of the signs. One of the participants piped up “That boy has the directions right on his shirt” – I don’t think the moderator appreciated this, he looked up, sighed and went right back to explaining with HIS T-shirt. DC got a kick out of the tournament and asked me more than once “to play“. I knew he really didn’t understand it and thought about asking the moderator if someone could play a quick game with him when they were finished, but during the practice rounds I did with him, I could see he really didn’t get it. He just threw whatever I threw. I told him he could play against me. We played at the table while the tournament was in progress. This seemed to make him happy enough.

After the tournament we were walking down one of the hallways and I noticed the TARDIS in the corner and pointed it out to DC. He recognized it immediately yelling, “Dr Who” We went to check it out. It was a photo booth. I don’t know what sort of directions the man gave DC when he was in the booth, but I could see from the computer screen outside that every time “Look at the Camera” came up on the screen, DC did something with his hands and his face, when the prompt was not there he sat looking at the screen normally. I’m sure he was following his understanding of the directions the man gave him.

He also happened to find a pair of TARDIS slippers. There were only two pair on the table, but thankfully one pair was his size. He was pretty darn happy to get them. He has a “thing” about slippers lately, I don’t know why. He has a few pair of slippers at home but never wanted to wear them, all of a sudden he loves slippers and wears them all of the time. The Tardis slippers were a nice find for him.

: K9

: Do Not BLINK

Pictures taken, slippers purchased, now DC was beginning to get antsy. He had enough for one night and as you may or may not know, DC’s favorite thing when on vacation – besides bookstores and restaurants, that is – is the hotel room. He really just LOVES hotel rooms, so he was anxious to get back. We arrived back at the hotel at a little after 9. Jokingly, I said to Doug, “I hope they didn’t give our room to someone else”

-I really have to stop joking like that, really!

We got to the door and the key would not work, none of our keys worked. There were 2 women just down the hall going into their room and I heard one say to the other, “Now look, their keys won’t work” and they asked us if our keys worked. We told them that they didn’t. They proceeded to inform us that they had just checked in and they were assigned room number 725 (our room). They opened the door, went in and realized that this was clearly someone else’s room (especially as you know, no one had come to clean it that day). They had just been down at the desk to have it corrected and in the process the people at the desk deactivated our keys.

DC just wanted to “go to the room” and again, we are left standing in the hallway. I was so worried about Shore Leave being too much for him, but as it turns out the hotel caused him (and me) more anxiety that anything else that weekend.

We went back down to the desk and informed them that once again, we were stuck in the hallway. Last night they had us walking into someone else’s room and tonight they sent strangers into our room. The women at the desk said that when the desk clerk switched our room the night before he didn’t mark it down – which explains why no one came to clean – they thought it was empty (but why did he call to ask our name?? – That will remain a mystery). One woman offered us free breakfast coupons for the rest of our stay (they must have to give out an awful lot of those) – I informed her that we had already been given coupons the night before for that error. They didn’t offer anything else. I could be wrong, but it did seem as though the women that walked into our room that night were upgraded to a suite – but, I could be wrong…………….

On Saturday morning, we decided to take in the “Fairy Tale Panel” back at Shore Leave. DC must have been much more exhausted from Friday than I realized as he fell asleep and slept (in the front row, mind you) throughout the entire hour. 200lbs of dead weight hanging on me the entire time – just what you want when you are running a panel, someone fast asleep in the front row! He did also sleep through the Once Upon a Time panel at ComicCon, but at least it was a dark room and we were nowhere close to the front. I suppose it could have been worse, he could have been snoring.
Saturday was much more crowded than Friday night had been. We tried to stay away from the most crowded areas, but refreshed from his “nap”, DC made a bee-line to the Buffy doll that I knew he wanted but refused to buy the day before – I think he was just too overwhelmed on Friday night to know what he wanted until he found the Tardis slippers, that is..
We had purchased tickets for 3 photo ops the night before, but we still had a little time to kill, so we went to the autograph tables, which surprisingly, were not very crowded.

Our first stop was Robert Picardo. I explained to DC that he was once on a Star Trek (Voyager). His sign read “I’m the Doctor”. This confused DC, he knew it wasn’t David Tennant, the only Dr. he is aware of, but the sign did say “I am the Dr.” so he called him Dr. Who.

– just following directions, Doc…….

We moved on to Michael Welch. He was exceptionally nice to DC – really, they all were.

We then headed to THE most confusing Photo Op line ever. We had tickets for 3 Photo Ops which meant we had to get in line 3 times. The lines did move quickly, but it was all very confusing trying to figure out where we were supposed to be.

The woman at the entrance to the photo room just Ooo’d and Ahh’d over DC every time we arrived for a photo. “Oh! Look at him, he is so excited!” – he was, plus there is no one that loves to have their picture taken more than DC does.

His first photo was with Robert Picardo, “Dr. Who” from a half hour earlier. He didn’t call him Dr. Who this time even though he was wearing a Dr. Who shirt (he didn’t have his “I’m the Doctor” sign with him and it wasn’t David Tennant on his shirt).

Next up was Eve Myles. She was a few minutes late getting to the photo room and when I saw her coming down the hallway, I got a little bit anxious. Her hair was much longer than it is on TV and in photos. DC LOVES long hair, LOVES it! Before we were faced with another ‘Snow White Incident’ I launched into “the rules”.
“DC, you can not touch her hair”
“Okay Mom”
“DC what is the rule? – Tell me”
“Don’t touch your hair” (the usual pronoun confusion,but I knew he understood)
and then….. just for good measure…
“DC, what is the other rule?”
“Don’t pick up the people”
and he didn’t……….

Next and thankfully, last as DC was tired of getting in and out of lines…. Silas Weir Mitchell. I love Grimm. DC has seen it a few times, but I don’t think he really knew who he was. It didn’t faze him because, someone was taking HIS picture and isn’t that really all that matters?

At this point, DC was starting to get edgy. Our last stop was the Eve Myles autograph table. We had a good 1/2 hour wait until she was finished with the Q&A she was leading. We slipped inside to listen and more importantly to move DC out of the hallway.

He didn’t want to sit down.

He didn’t want to stand where we were standing.

He didn’t want to stand in the next place we moved to.

We moved close to the door and he seemed okay with that.

But then a staff person came over and told us we couldn’t stand there so we moved back to the hallway.

We decided to just wait at the table.

There was a wonderful lady sitting at the table who just happened to be a Special Ed teacher (we seem to run into Special Ed teachers everywhere we go, she was the second on this trip), she let DC pick out the photo he wanted autographed early. He picked a photo of Ms. Myles from a Merlin episode. We chatted a bit, she chatted with DC a bit as well. She told him he was doing a good job waiting – he loves compliments, who doesn’t.

The Dalek from the Tardis photo booth was now roaming the hallway “EXTERMINATE!”, so that helped to keep him occupied until Ms. Myles was finished with her Q&A. When she arrived at the table, the woman whispered something to her and then introduced her to DC. She told her that he was waiting a long time for her. He was first in line for her autograph, she was lovely to him. He was thrilled…..

but he was also “done”.

I didn’t try to push him to do any more. We arrived that morning at 9 and it was now after 3. That was a long stretch for him, even with the nap. He had a few sketchy moments throughout the day, but I really I think, overall he did a fantastic job!

In the words of DC, “We all had a wonderful time”

except for this guy…………..

this guy….

and a big shout-out to the “trying to be helpful staff member” that asked Doug (aka “This Guy”) if he needed help finding something….

“I’m just looking for some place to hang myself”

(Thanks Guy, I’m sure, Doug was waiting all day for an opportunity to use that line, and there it was)

#LLAP

Baltimore, Over the Rainbow and Back – Part 3

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

: Part 3

Now that is was permissible to speak the name of “Island that must not be named”, the Bahamas, I was able to tell DC that Coco Cay, our next stop was also in the Bahamas.

Before I get to that – the evening after we came back from Atlantis, we decided to give the dining room a try for dinner. I am usually not a big fan of eating in the dining room with DC. The tables are crowded with strangers. I get anxious because DC, although pretty well-behaved in restaurants, can get a little bit loud and chewing with his mouth closed does not come naturally to him, he has to be reminded continuously. When he does remember on his own, he feels the need to point it out to me throughout the entire dinner. He likes to bring a book with him whenever we go out to eat, but at these crowded tables, it is not always possible, there just isn’t enough room.

I was never of the mind that other people should be made to just accept DC’s behavior. Yes, if I am trying to manage the situation I can live without the stares and comments – but letting him do whatever he wants in the name of awareness, is not something I ever subscribed to. I do not believe that every behavior can or should be blamed on his autism – it is never used as an excuse. Letting him run around to other tables, throwing items or any other behavior that may have crept up when he was younger, just because he has autism, was not going to happen. I don’t expect other people in a restaurant, who are out to have a nice time for themselves, to have to make allowances for his behavior. In the past and for the most part, when he was younger, I’ve had to take him outside to calm down if it didn’t look like the situation could be managed inside or we’ve left places altogether. I agree that we need to raise awareness and acceptance, I do not agree that we have no regard for other people. To me, and this is my opinion only, that is not raising awareness about autism, but causing resentment. He has as much right to go anywhere and participate in anything as everyone else does and as I said, there were and still are times when he does get too loud or gets too anxious and yes, I do believe that some allowances should be made in the name of awareness, just as allowances should be made for young children that don’t necessarily have control of themselves out in public – we know all children will never be 100% well behaved in public, and we know that our children will not either – but letting them do just anything they want and calling it “awareness” – I just don’t get that.

When we were seated, we were glad to see only 3 other chairs and place settings, this meant (hopefully) only one other family. The other family arrived. They were a very nice couple from New Jersey with a 6-year-old named “Jimmy”. They didn’t seem to be uncomfortable with DC and the very best thing was that Jimmy didn’t seem to be afraid of DC as some young children seem to be!

He put up with him hugging the stuffing out of him and tried to communicate with him. Jimmy’s mother and father didn’t seem to mind being called “Jimmy’s Mom” and “Jimmy’s Dad” whenever DC had something to say to them. DC also had plenty of room for his ever-present book.

After dinner we decided to go to Karaoke or “Okey Okey” in DC-speak. We attended the night before and DC seemed to like it. He even sang “Over the Rainbow”. Again, people recognized him throughout the next day so once again, he was loving his “celebrity status”.

We tried to pick a different song, but there were so many and I couldn’t come up with one off the top of my head that we could find in all of the listings. We also didn’t want to waste too much time getting his name in because although he seemed to like it, I knew he wasn’t going to sit there for hours waiting for his turn to come up, so “Over the Rainbow” it was…. again.

The crew member running the “Okey Okey” was wonderful, she recognized him right away from the night before. Had I known the introduction she had prepared for him I would have started taping sooner.

(Video edited for time – Over the Rainbow is a long song, you don’t realize how long until you are sweating out the performance)

She was wonderful and the audience was wonderful. He was thrilled. Celebrity status in tact, we headed back to the room – DC’s favorite place.

I do have to acknowledge the random maintenance man who let himself into our room at 10:45 to change a light bulb while DC and I were sleeping. Thanks, sir!

Once in CoCo Kay, we opted for the glass bottom boat tour before hitting the beach. It was only an hour-long so we thought it would not be too much for DC. I am, by nature a “people watcher”. The people sitting across from me may have had the impression it would be much longer trip or that we may be shipwrecked 30 feet from shore, as they brought most of the breakfast buffet with them. The man next to me was very entertaining as well. He was not having any of this. His wife, on the other hand was very excited about the whole thing. At one point the ship hand began diving under the glass and bringing up live sea creatures to pass around (I suspect they already had these creatures on the boat, but they made a nice production of him driving).

– Passing around sea creatures – I am now holding my breath…….

A BIG THANK YOU to the man seated 4 or 5 seats before DC for dropping a creature, and taking all of the pressure off – I could breathe again. Even if DC dropped a creature at this point, it was okay because someone had done it before him!

: Fish

: Fish and

: more fish

: Searching the bottom

The entertaining man on the other side of me however was not going to be touching any of these creatures…”If I wanted to touch vermin, I would go and pet some rats” – I had to pass every one over him to his wife. He was then required to take a picture of his wife holding each and every one of them (and there were an awful lot of them).

After the boat ride, we spent some time on the beach, had lunch of course and headed back to the ship and at DC’s request, back to the room – “I need to get some rest”. DC was happy to lay in his bed with his books watching reruns of “Bones” (because, he was “Angel”, of course) and “Castle” (“Captain Hammer”) on “Two – Five” and eventually, fall asleep.

Our final stop, the next day was going to be Key West. DC remembered that there was a Hard Rock – or Hard Rock “Caf” – in DC-speak, in Key West, so that was all he was focused on.

We took the tour that went to the Hemingway House. We’d been past it or in front of it many times, but we had never taken the time to go inside. We met with the tour guide who announced that we would be walking approximately 2 miles in total, but the tour would take at least 3 hours!

I knew at this point that this tour was a mistake! It takes 30 minutes to walk two miles – 3 hours meant a lot of standing around in the heat listening to stories along the way.

By the time we made it to the Hemingway House, DC had had enough. I saw a look on his face I hadn’t seen in years. Now DC does get anxious when he arrives anywhere, even if it is somewhere he really wants to be. I can always see the change, on his face. He stims, he repeats random words – “Tinkerbell, Tinkerbell, Tinkerbell” or “Another Wendy, Another Wendy, Another Wendy” and his eyes get wide. This was different. This looked like it was going to be a full on meltdown.

I took him off the crowded porch and tried to walk around to the back of the house where there were fewer people. We stayed there until he calmed down. Fortunately, he was able to calm himself down. He was calm enough that he said he would go inside. We quickly went through the house and informed the tour guide that DC was having trouble and we left the tour. It took all of 10 minutes to get to Hard Roc “Caf” and all was fine once again.

Thursday was a tough day on board. It was a day at sea, heading back to Baltimore. It was cold, so not only was every passenger on board but most were indoors. There was not a lot for DC to do. He just wanted to stay in the room but I told him we had to leave for a little while at least so the invisible cabin steward could come to clean the room.

He did participate in the “Wishes at Sea” walk for Make a Wish Foundation.

Unfortunately the walk did not take all that long and it was getting colder and colder.

We tried to go shopping, but it was so crowded that no one could move. We managed to make our way into one store where DC found a Disney coloring book and markers (not that he didn’t have both in the room, but these were NEW). After wandering the entire ship, looking for somewhere for him to sit and color, we found a table in one of the bars, filled with others that seemed to have the same idea. I had more coffee and DC colored happily for a good long while.

Coloring done and believe it or not, I was at “coffee capacity”, we took another couple of laps around the ship and FINALLY it was time for lunch.

After lunch, DC REALLY wanted to go back to the room – “I have to get some rest”. He was happy to be back in the room, reading his books and watching “Two – Five” . He fell asleep as he always does, and fortunately that killed a few more hours and it was time for Dinner!

Thursday, was just hard. I was glad when it was time to go to bed……………..

By Friday morning, DC was ready to go home. He had a great time, but he was ready. Our original plan was to stop off in New York City (Dc’s favorite place) on the way home, but all we heard about during the last few days on board was just how much snow had been falling since we left Baltimore a week earlier. So we decided we’d better just get driving when we got into port.

When we did arrive in Baltimore, there was not one flake of snow on the ground. Our shuttle driver reported that they did have close to a foot but they had some rain in the days that followed so all of the snow was gone.

We decided the stick to our decision to just drive home because we did not know how bad it was going to be closer to home. Fortunately the New York City stop was also going to be a surprise, so DC didn’t know anything about it. The change in plans did not pose a problem.

Home – just a “little bit” of snow!

It was a very good thing we did…………………………..

We had to shovel our way in………

See: Baltimore, Over the Rainbow and Back – Pt. 1

and Baltimore, Over the Rainbow and Back – Pt 2</

The CALL TO ACTION – A Memorial for Avonte

Posted by TakingItAStepAtATime

Call To Action

– Co-written with Gizelle Tolbert

It has been close to 10 months since Avonte Oquendo left his school, unsupervised, past security guards, through an unlocked door. It has been almost 7 months since the devastating conclusion to the search for Avonte.

I do not live in New York, I did not know this beautiful child. I do not know his family, but this story hit he straight in the heart and I did anything I could do from where I live to help in the search. I remember the fear, and the worry, wishing I could do more than just donating flyers, postage or posting and reposting his information – and finally, I remember the heartbreaking, overwhelming and shocking feeling when he was found. All of it……… too close to home.

When Gizelle contacted me a few days ago asking if I would help in the effort to build a memorial for Avonte, all of those feelings came right back up to the surface.

As it has been said, Avonte, brought an entire city together. His disappearance brought an often, very separated Autism community together. It cast a spotlight on the problem of wandering/elopement of Autistic children and adults. He has raised awareness to the issues that many families face in trying to keep their children safe. Our children should be safe, at all costs…………. Avonte should have been safe in school.

– Avonte Oquendo should be memorialized, in any and every way possible.

Please read below and lend your support to Avonte’s Memorial

– written by Gizelle Tolbert

– “The one year anniversary of Avonte’s disappearance, October 4, 2014, is less than three months away. #AvontesLaw may finally pass this week, but Avonte’s Memorial at Gantry Park has stalled. We need to come together to be sure that both of these items are approved.

That being said, we ask that you to share, post, call and write (have your friends and family do the same) the necessary people who can help make this happen.

Please e-mail, mail, tweet or phone your thoughts to every major network, radio station, newspaper and magazine.

Ultimately, Mayor Bill de Blasio will be the person to approve or not approve, therefore, let us post to the other media entities but more-so to the mayor’s office. I have provided the contact information for his office, Twitter and FB Account.

I would like to thank everyone in advance!

It has also been rumored that a song will be released on the anniversary day as well”.
Contact:
Mayor Bill de Blasio
City Hall
New York, NY 10007 Phone: (212) 788-3000

On-Line Contact Form: http://www.nyc.gov/html/static/pages/officeofthemayor/contact.shtml

Twitter: @billdeblasio
FB: https://www.facebook.com/mayordeblasio

New York City Media Contact List http://www.nytix.com/Links/TV/articles/newsmediacontacts.html

Additional Contact and e-mail addresses missing from the above list:
CBS News – Chris Ender – VP – cender@cbs.com
60 Minutes – Kevin Tedesco – Director kev@cbsnews.com
NBC – http://www.NBC.com (on-line form)

If you would like to contact Gizelle, you can contact her on Twitter @candi_kizzez or e-mail takeanotherstep@yahoo.com

Please let us all join together once more in Avonte’s name and memory…………